Corpses of Regret

what to do with all that darkness in the middle of the day

Good Monday morning!

I think it is safe to say that at least here in North America it is a big day. It is the day of a total eclipse of the sun. Though those of us raised by science and current Western culture have no reason to fear such an event, there is no denying that it is a rare and unusual occurrence. It reminds us that we are subjects in this universe, participatory subjects, but still subjects. We do not control the sun, the moon, the sky, the clouds, the birds, the ocean and on and on. We are subjects.

I’d guess that just the word “subjects” triggers a lot of us into a place of resistance, opposition, even confusion. Who wants to be the subject of unknown forces? Not me. And yet, this is, without a doubt, a reality for everyone on the planet. No one has jurisdiction over the elements, over the forces that have brought into being this particular planet with its particular atmosphere and environment.

What to do when you find yourself confronted by these forces, irrevocably subject to things beyond your control? What do you do to respond with grace and kindness to such a situation? In my world, you make offerings. You invite such forces to sit with you, be with you and you provide them with food, drink, gifts, the things you would offer to guests in your home. In acknowledging these forces as guests, we are making a relationship, opening a conversation. Although it is an open-ended, one could say never-ending, conversation, it is a conversation nonetheless.

There is a strange and wonderful relationship between the forces of the natural world and the forces inside myself. The forces of the natural world have agreed to take from me my darkness, my shadows, my regrets. They swoop in, blanketing me with wind, sunshine, moonshine, water, and they whoosh out with all that has darkened my psyche in a mere moment. I cannot explain how such a thing happens, but I know that it does.

Does that sound preposterous? Ridiculous? It might. But it is true. Just for a moment consider that the world, the earth herself, does not resent, resist or oppose darkness, shadow or regret. The earth, the sky, the ocean, they do not prefer light over dark. They do not argue when they are offered things that others do not want. The elements simply make use of those things we cast off; composting them, consuming them, incinerating them.

I think the whole thing rests on my willingness to be a subject. Am I willing to be a subject of the earth, the sky, the ocean, the wind, the clouds? Am I willing to acknowledge how little I know of the mystery that surrounds me on this unicorn of a planet? Am I willing to offer up whatever it is they can use to make more magic? I am.

Will you join me? Offer up your regrets, your shadows, your deepest fears, let them be a feast for the wind, the sky, the sun, the rain. You don’t offer in hopes that you will be free forever of such things. You offer because you know you don’t need these things in the moment. You offer because they were once dreams and now they are good dust for the earth. You offer because you will make more of such things and again and again become a good subject, letting go of the things that do not serve you but can serve the earth and the sky, creating again and again the conditions for magic and mystery, magic being the fact that you can make the relationship and mystery being how it is done.

If you are wondering how you might make offerings when the basis of the whole thing is some kind of magic and mystery, here are a few thoughts. You can offer something to drink, something to eat, something to burn. You can make a fire and offer to the fire. It can be a big fire or a little fire. You can offer to the earth by way of the forest floor, the garden or the sand or to the water by way of the sea or a river or a lake or a stream. You can offer water, juice, tea, coffee, gin. You can offer cookies, crackers, cake, carrots, lettuce, apples. And you can offer little mementos, letters, objects (made of natural material). The relationship is yours and you can offer what makes the relationship vivid, alive, real to you. No one else needs to see but you can share with others if you want them to see. Words are not required but can be used. Songs are not required but can be sung. These things are just symbols, just gestures and objects but they will hold your darkness as it makes its way back home to the center of the earth, the sky or the sea if you choose. Then having made the darkness your own and having also given it away, the light returns.